Why Hatred Is A Curse And How To Free Yourself From One

Free yourself

Possibly the worst you could ask of a man is to forgive the unforgivable. It seems easy to explain the reasoning behind it, yet when the time comes to forgive, words seem cheap and unwarranted.

Nevertheless, life is too short to hate, angst and depressed over someone who should not matter to you, and rightly so. Here’s the guy who purposely afflicts pain on you, and yet you end up cursing yourself because of him.

Confused?

Hate consumes us. Hate unfortunately does not harm the person who’s at fault but yourself. When you hate, you are deliberately cursing yourself to be unhappy. And the longer you’re at it, the longer the curse last.

As you turn moody, it affects the relationship you have with the people around you, your job performance and your general happiness.

Talk about double jeopardy.

I won’t deny that it’s natural for us to hate when things go wrong. After all, when you are wronged, betrayed and pained, it does hurt. And to respond to evil with kindness seems unnatural and sometimes beyond comprehensible. So, why do you want to forgive?

Because you want to be fair to yourself. It is because you deserved to be happy and free, just like the rest of us.

Let’s take a look at some of the steps that can ease your pain and take away the hatred that has gotten the best of you.

1. Realize the curse you are afflicting to yourself – As said earlier, hatred does not harm the person at fault but the bearer. You want to get rid of it because it matters not for him but yourself.

2. See the good side of things – It’s too easy to focus on the negative side of an event when things go wrong. Try instead to look at the good side that emerged from the situation. What can you learn from the experience? Does the experience help you grow as a person? Fortunately, there is always a good side to everything. Unfortunately, however, it can only be found by the people who are looking for it.

3. Love yourself – Love yourself by forgiving others. Realize that you deserve so much more, and this too shall pass, just like the rest that has come before it.

4. Stop telling “the story” – If you’re like the majority of us, painful events always seem to keep repeating itself in our mind. Try to stop reminding yourself of the pain and move on. Remember, you’re worth so much more.

5. Know the mantra – “I forgive you.” While you don’t need to tell anyone that the person is forgiven, every time “the story” is making a rerun, remember to repeat this mantra. It works great because it counters any hatred you feel at that moment. And after some time, you will mean what you said.

While there is no questioning the benefit of forgiving a person, it does however, lead us to another important question.

Should you forgive and forget?

For my take, it depends on the circumstances. Does he deserve a second chance? Often than not, when we’re too focus on the fault that the other person did, we tend to discredit all the good things that he has done along the way. Calm yourself down and try to evaluate fairly, for him and for yourself.

Important notes would be, was it intentional? It’s not the result of an action that matters as some may come to think, it is always the intention behind the action. Things sometimes can go out of hand, and it should be as no man is perfect. To be fair, you should always judge an action based on the intention rather than the outcome.

All in all however, you know what they say about the leopard.

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